373+ Peter Griffin Quotes That Will Brighten Your Day (Images)

Peter Griffin happens to be the primary character of “Family Guy,” the famous American animated sitcom.

He has been voiced by the creator of the series, Seth MacFarlane, and was first aired on TV 📺 in the year 1998.

Peter had been created as well as designed by none other than Seth MacFarlane. Peter has been the husband of Lois Griffin, and his children happen to be Chris, Meg, and Stewie.

He is also the owner of an adorable pooch named Brian. In the following paragraphs, we have mentioned some of the most well-known Peter Griffin quotes that you will ever come across.

Peter Griffin Quotes

  • Excuse me, is your fridge of yours functioning properly? The reason for this is that if it actually runs, then you will probably function just like you, extremely homosexually.
  • I am of the notion that it hardly matters from where we have come as long as we happen to be of an identical religion.
  • Now the daddy of the kid has drunk so much that the Statue of Liberty would have taken off her clothes.
Peter Griffin Quotes
  • Even though I might be a stupid man, I am not one thing, Sir; that is I am not an idiot.
  • OK, wait for one more minute, and then in case there are a couple of pink lines …
  • Those are not your children, peter. That’s the line-up for Nick-at-Night.

  • That is the Street Fighter.

  • Those are what you call colors.

  • Together we will be able to perform just about anything: overcome any adversity, and fight any enemy.
Peter Griffin Quotes
  • On what subject are you talking?

  • Oh God, Brian, I have come across a message in my Alphabet of mine. It says, “Oooooo.”

  • Those are actually Cheerios, Peter.

  • No no. I am simply joking. She is dead.

  • You stinky, filthy whore.

  • You filthy, sexual, disease-carrying, and street-walking prostitute.

  • Ok, it’s more than enough!

  • Seriously, who needs to purchase any novelty fire extinguisher?
Peter Griffin Quotes
  • I am going to tell you who. A person who likes to put his entire family in grave danger.

  • Well, you people finally managed to do it. At last, we went to an eatery where none shouted at us, and the rest of the area praised them.

  • I had such a smart idea that my head was going to explode if I knew what I was going to talk about.

  • This party would be much better if Jesus were present here.

  • I am going to convert water into a funk for my subsequent miracle.

Peter Griffin Sayings

I happen to be the most non-competitive of all people here. As a result, I win.

Even though you might think that Lois is extremely precious, she is of no value to me.

Did you go through the print on this particular loan contract, Peter?

Of you would imagine a nude woman by the term “read,” then yes.

I am completely dressed up, I am young, and going to marry the girl I am in love with.

Peter Griffin Quotes

The guy smells like he has already made himself wet.

That took place in the morning, and there is no need to flatter yourself.

Do you want to talk about awkward moments? I summoned Lois as “Frank” once while having sex with her.

I cannot believe that I have not been called back by the fucking Jesus. I left a message for him 4 hours earlier.

Meg, shut your mouth. You really don’t matter.

What is the matter, Peter? You ended up selecting a turkey ahead of me! 

I promise that I believed dogs were able to breathe underwater.

Did you tell me right now that I am overweight?

Well, right. You happen to be quite fat.

This is something important to me.

What were you actually occupied with that night, darling?

I was so obsessed with her till I came across you, Lois. You happen to be my silver medal of mine.

Peter Griffin Quotes

I always believed that pooches laid eggs. And I learned something valuable today.

I think that we have already learned that life happens to be a horrible thing irrespective of you happen to be or from where you come.

What? It is not similar to the Internet to become mad about something really stupid and small. 

Just a second! I have not seen any stripper distributing tacos for free. Lois, you told me a lie!

Peter, did you use your metal detector for robbing the people on the beach?

That is half of the story, in fact. I likewise hooted at a breastfeeding lady.

How will it be possible for me to become a DJ? I am only a man along with an inflated self-image plus a laptop.

Funny Peter Griffin Quotes

“You know what really grinds my gears? People who don’t appreciate a good fart joke.”

“I’m not fat. I’m just easier to see.”

“Alcohol is the answer. What was the question again?”

“Why do they call it fast food? You wait in line for ten minutes, and they give you a number. If I wanted that, I’d have stayed in school.”

“I may not be the sharpest crayon in the toolshed, but I’m pretty sure I’m hilarious.”

“Did you know that if you hold your ear up to a stranger’s leg, you can actually hear them say, ‘What the hell are you doing?'”

“Why get a gym membership when you can get fat for free?”

“I’m like a Rubik’s Cube – the more you play with me, the harder I get.”

“Life is like a box of chocolates – it doesn’t last as long for fat people.”

“I’m not lazy; I’m just conserving energy for when I really need it, like avoiding exercise.”

“You can’t be mad at me forever. Eventually, you’ll get hungry.”

“Lois, if I’m not back in five minutes… wait longer!”

“You know you’re old when your back goes out more than you do.”

“I’m not fat, I’m festively plump!”

Peter Griffin Inspirational Quotes

“Life’s like a buffet – take a little bit of everything and savor the flavors of adventure.”

“Why worry about the past? Just remember, mistakes make the best stories!”

“Every stumble is just a new dance move waiting to be discovered.”

“Don’t be afraid to take the road less traveled – you might find a fast-food joint at the end.”

“Sometimes, the best way to solve a problem is to imagine it’s a giant chicken and just face it head-on.”

“They say laughter is the best medicine, so if you’re feeling down, call up your friends and start a comedy marathon.”

“Life’s too short to hold grudges. Forgive, forget, and find something else to complain about!”

“Dream big, because you never know when your wacky ideas might become reality – just ask the guy who invented the Pawtucket Patriot Ale arcade game!”

“Embrace change. After all, who would’ve thought that a talking dog and an evil baby would become your closest friends?”

“Life’s full of curveballs. But hey, if you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge anything!”

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Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Who is Peter Griffin?

Peter Griffin is a fictional character and the main protagonist of the animated television show “Family Guy.” He is known for his quirky personality, humorous antics, and unique way of looking at the world.

Can Peter Griffin quotes be used for social media captions?

Absolutely! Peter Griffin quotes can make for entertaining and attention-grabbing captions on social media posts, especially if you’re sharing a humorous photo or reflecting on a funny situation.

Can Peter Griffin quotes be used in birthday cards or messages?

Definitely! Adding a light-hearted Peter Griffin quote to a birthday card or message can bring a smile to the recipient’s face and make the celebration more enjoyable.

Peter Griffin Quotes

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